One Step at a Time
by koger109
Summary: Bella/Jasper story. When Jasper and Bella discover they have feelings for each other while the family is away on a hunting trip, they decide to keep them locked up so the rest of the family can be happy. Please read and review!
1. A New Revelation

**Chapter 1: A New Revelation**

**A/N: I'm sorry I keep starting so many stories! Please review. This is the summer after Jasper attacked Bella, but Edward never thought she was dead and never went to Italy.**

_**Jasper's POV**_

Bella and Edward walked through the door, and I looked up at them from my seat on the couch. Bella had her overnight bag, so I knew she'd be staying here with me while everyone else went hunting. It was summer, so they'd be gone for a week, leaving me here with the girl I had once attacked.

"Have fun while I'm gone. I'll be back before you know it," Edward said to Bella.

"Okay, I will. I love you," she replied. I could hear the nervousness in her voice, and I could feel it radiating off of her. He kissed her sweetly.

"I love you, too. Call me if you need anything." Then, he walked out the door with Carlisle, Esme, Emmett, and Rosalie in tow.

When he said those three words - I love you - I felt a weird feeling conjure up in my heart. Was it…jealously?

I shook the thought from my mind, realizing that even though I had already said goodbye to everyone else, Alice was still standing there with a blank expression. I wrapped my arms around her and held her close. I knew this face quite well.

"What do you see, baby?" I whispered.

She shook her head and smiled, but I could feel the sadness welling up inside of her. "It was nothing. Have a good time. I love you so much. I want you to know that whatever happens, I won't be mad." She pecked my lips and left before I could ask what she meant.

Bella took her bag to Edward's room while I was talking to Alice, so she was walking down the stairs when I looked over. She was amazingly beautiful, even though she was human. I forced myself to look away, and I sat down.

"So…what do you want to do today?" she asked in a quiet voice, positioning herself at the other end of the sofa.

I thought about that for a minute. "I don't know. We can talk and learn more about each other. I think the only thing I know about you is that you're deeply in love with Edward Cullen," I smiled.

She smiled, too, and said, "I think that's a great idea."

We talked for a couple of hours, then her stomach growled. I laughed, and she blushed. We walked into the kitchen, and I asked her what she wanted to eat.

"Do you have a microwaveable pizza or something?"

I went to the freezer and pulled out a bag of pizza rolls. "These okay?"

She nodded. "Thanks, Jasper."

When she said my name, it made a chill run down my spine. The way her voice formed the word would've made me blush if I was still human.

"No problem, darlin'." I saw a light pink color dust her cheeks as she put the pizza rolls in the microwave, and I grinned.

She ate her food quickly, and we settled onto the couch once again. This time, we were closer; her head was leaning on my shoulder, and her body was nestled against mine. It felt right, like she was supposed to be there.

I internally chastised myself for thinking these thoughts. Bella was Edward's, and I had Alice. I drilled that into my mind as we watched a movie. I was so consumed in my chanting within that I didn't even know what it was.

Soon, Bella fell asleep. I didn't want to move her and chance waking her up, so I let her stay where she was. I draped an arm around her shoulder, but instead, she laid her head in my lap and curled up on the couch. I grabbed a throw off the back of it and covered her up. I smiled at the small, fragile human using me as a pillow. She was adorable, and sweet, and kind, and trusting, and lovable, and-

_Stop it, Jasper! _

The thing was, though, I couldn't. I wanted to place my cool lips upon hers and keep them there forever, although I knew that I couldn't. She loved Edward, and I loved Alice. But it didn't stop the feelings I was having towards Bella.

I looked down at her peaceful face and heard her quietly whisper, "Jasper…"

I knew at once that what I felt earlier _was_ jealously. I wanted Bella to be mine and mine only. But I also wanted my brother and Alice to be happy. I didn't want to destroy them with my new revelation.

So I would be perfectly content with just keeping my feelings locked up inside while the rest of the world lived their perfect lives.

I _had_ to be.


	2. Guitar in the Garden

**Chapter 2: Guitar in the Garden**

**A/N: I forgot to say this last chapter, but Edward and Bella are engaged. Crappy title, but yeah. I might add a quote for the rest of the chapters, like below, if I find a good one.**

**QUOTE: When words fail, music speaks.**

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_**Jasper's POV**_

The next morning, Bella woke up surprised.

We were both laying down on the couch. She was on the edge, and I had my ice cold arms wrapped around her torso.

"Um…Jasper?"

"Mmm?"

"Can you let me go?" she asked.

"Oh. Yeah, sorry." I let her go quickly, and she ran off to what I assume was the bathroom.

I was shocked to feel a pang of longing from her as she got up. I ran a hand through my hair, thinking about it. She came back out and sat down again.

"Thanks, Jasper…"

My brows wrinkled in confusion. "For what?"

She blushed a bright crimson. "For holding me. It helps me sleep better."

"Oh. No worries, Bella. I enjoyed it." _Shit. Did that just slip out?_

She smiled a small smile and brushed some hair away from her face. "So, what should we do today?" She looked at the clock, and her eyes went wide. "It's already 12:30?! I've never slept that late!"

I laughed. "Let's just watch a funny movie or something. Besides, you needed the rest, babe." _Damn. Her presence just makes me say things I shouldn't._

She giggled. I mean, she fucking giggled, and it turned me on so much. I wanted her so badly, but I was a gentleman, so I would not even think about it.

We put in _The Notebook_, and she laid down on my lap, like the night before.

The next few days went on like this - watching movies, laying down with one another while she slept, having comments slip out from nowhere - but it was fun being with Bella. It was like she was becoming a part of me.

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"Come on. I want to show you something," I said, after she woke up and ate breakfast.

She grinned. "Okay."

I ran her to a small garden a few miles from the house. Like Edward, I had my own tiny field, and I had never shown anyone before. I liked to go there and play my guitar, just my music and me. And now, Bella.

I set her down, and she looked around in awe. "It's amazing. So beautiful."

"Just like you," I whispered softly into her ear. I straightened up and moved away. "Sorry. That was uncalled for."

"It's okay, Jazz. That was sweet, but I'm nowhere near as beautiful as you."

We smiled at each other for a long moment, then I took her hand and led her to a large oak tree. My guitar was resting against it, in its case. We both sat down, and I pulled it out. I began to play a tune that had just come to mind. I liked the song, so I began to sing it. The title was _A Lonely September, _and it was by the Plain White T's.

_I'm sittin' here all by myself_

_Just trying to think of something to do_

_Tryin' to think of something, anything_

_Just to keep me from thinking of you_

_And you know it's not working out_

'_Cause you're all that's on my mind_

_One thought of you is all it takes _

_To leave the rest of the world behind_

_Well, I didn't mean for this to go as far as it did_

_And I didn't mean to get so close and share what we did_

_And I didn't mean to fall in love, but I did_

_And you didn't mean to love me back, but I know you did_

_I'm sittin' here tryin' to convince myself _

_That you're not the one for me_

_But the more I think, the less I believe it_

_And the more I want you here with me_

_You know the holidays are coming up_

_I don't want to spend them alone_

_Memories of Christmas time with you_

_Will just kill me if I'm on my own_

_Well, I didn't mean for this to go as far as it did_

_And I didn't mean to get so close and share what we did_

_And I didn't mean to fall in love, but I did_

_And you didn't mean to love me back, but I know you did_

_I know it's not the smartest thing to do_

_We just can't seem to get it right_

_But what I wouldn't give to have one more chance tonight_

_One more chance tonight_

_I'm sittin' here tryin' to entertain myself _

_With this old guitar_

_But with all my inspiration gone_

_It's not getting me very far_

_I look around my room_

_And everything I see reminds me of you_

_Oh, baby, please_

_Won't you take my hand?_

_We've got nothing left to prove_

_Well, I didn't mean for this to go as far as it did_

_And I didn't mean to get so close and share what we did_

_And I didn't mean to fall in love, but I did_

_And you didn't mean to love me back, but I know you did_

_And I didn't mean to meet you then_

_We were just kids_

_And I didn't mean to give you chills_

_The way that I kiss_

_And I didn't mean to fall in love_

_But I did_

_And you didn't mean to love me back_

_But I know you did_

_Don't say you didn't love me back_

'_Cause you know you did_

_No, you didn't mean to love me back_

_But you did_

I stopped playing and looked over at Bella. She had tears running down her cheeks.

"Bella, what's wrong?" I asked, my voice filled with concern. I checked her emotions, but they were filled with happiness, and contentment, and…love? "Why are you crying, darlin'?"

"No reason," she grinned. "You sing wonderfully."

"Thanks. That means a lot." I let her hold in whatever the reason actually was, knowing that something had to set off the waterworks.

I zipped my guitar back up in its case and grabbed Bella, running them both home. I realized we were running low on food, so I told her I was going to get some groceries.

"Don't be gone too long. Sometimes your house freaks me out," she admitted, laughing in a carefree way, tears long forgotten.

"Okay, darlin'. I'll be back in a flash." I winked at her and left, feeling her desire and longing increase.

I came back about thirty minutes later, and as I approached the door, I heard the piano being played. At first, I thought Edward and the rest of the family were back, but I hoped that was not the case. I knew for a fact it wasn't when I heard the voice of an angel coming through the door. I sat leaned against it and listened to Bella's version of _Crush_ by David Archuletta.

_I hung up the phone tonight_

_Something happened for the first time deep inside_

_It was a rush, what a rush_

'_Cause the possibility_

_That you would ever feel the same way about me_

_It's just too much, just too much_

_Why do I keep running from the truth?_

_All I ever think about is you_

_You've got me hypnotized_

_So mesmerized _

_And I've just got to know_

_Do you ever think_

_When you're all alone_

_All that we can be_

_Where this thing can go?_

_Am I crazy or falling in love?_

_Is it real or just another crush?_

_Do you catch a breath when I look at you?_

_Are you holding back, like the way I do?_

'_Cause I'm trying and trying to walk away_

_But I know this crush ain't goin' away_

_Goin' away_

_Has it ever crossed your mind_

_When we're hanging, spending time boy_

_Are we just friends?_

_Is there more, is there more?_

_See it's a chance we've got to take_

'_Cause I believe that we can make this into something that will last_

_Last forever, forever_

_Do you ever think_

_When you're all alone_

_All that we can be_

_Where this thing can go?_

_Am I crazy or falling in love?_

_Is it real or just another crush?_

_Do you catch a breath when I look at you?_

_Are you holding back, like the way I do?_

'_Cause I'm trying and trying to walk away_

_But I know this crush ain't goin' away_

_Goin' away_

_Why do I keep running from the truth?_

_All I ever think about is you_

_You've got me hypnotized_

_So mesmerized _

_And I've just got to know_

_Do you ever think_

_When you're all alone_

_All that we can be_

_Where this thing can go?_

_Am I crazy or falling in love?_

_Is it real or just another crush?_

_Do you catch a breath when I look at you?_

_Are you holding back, like the way I do?_

'_Cause I'm trying and trying to walk away_

_But I know this crush ain't goin' away_

_Goin' away_

_Goin' away_

_Goin' away_

_Goin' away_

"Oh, Jasper. I wish that I could tell you…" she said to herself.

Then, I walked inside with the groceries. "I didn't know you could play the piano."


	3. Betrayal

**Chapter 3: Betrayal**

**A/N: I'm going to stop labeling POV's until it changes. And a reviewer pointed this out: this could be counted as set in Eclipse; the army hasn't come, yet, but the Volturi aren't after Bella because Edward never went there. Please review. Thank you.**

**QUOTE: And all that I feel is bundled up into those three words, those eight letters…I love you.**

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_Then, I walked inside with the groceries. "I didn't know you could play the piano."_

"Wh-when did you get here?" she asked nervously.

"I heard the whole song, if that's what you mean."

"Oh. I took lessons when I was little, along with ballet. My mom threw me into everything," she explained, rolling her big, brown eyes.

"Well, it was beautiful." I walked into the kitchen to put up the food.

She followed me and began to help. We both reached for a can, and our hands brushed against each other. I felt a spark run through my body from the touch, but I disregarded it and blamed it on my imagination. I could tell Bella felt it, too, though, for she looked up into my eyes and peered deeply. She began to lean in, as if she was going to kiss me, then ran upstairs before our lips were even an inch apart. I sighed and continued to store the groceries.

I couldn't help but think about the electricity that shot through my body as her fingers found mine. We had been leaning against each other and laying down with one another, but I had never felt this. This felt like real, true love. I couldn't even concentrate on what emotions coming from her room because of it, but I sensed that there was a heavy layer of betrayal radiating throughout the house. I walked upstairs and found her in Edward's room, I mean, _their_ room.

I leaned against the door jam, my hands in my pockets and my eyes on her. "Why do you feel so guilty?" I asked in a mere whisper, hoping she would hear me.

She patted the space beside her on the giant, king-sized bed. "Jasper, I've been feeling things that I shouldn't be feeling towards you…"

I sat down and pulled her into my lap, and she buried her face into my chest. "I know exactly what you mean, Bella. I…" I didn't know if I should say it or not, but I decided quickly. "I love you."

She looked up at me and placed a hand on my cheek. "I love you, too." She said it so beautifully, and I could tell that she meant it. She searched my face for a moment, then finally commanded in a sweet, soft voice, "Kiss me, Jasper."

I nodded slightly and did just that. I placed my ice cold lips upon her warm ones and wrapped my arms around her waist. She tangled her small hand into my hair and deepened the kiss, moving to where she was straddling me. I let her explore my mouth with her silky tongue, but pulled away a little too quickly. The thirst was getting to me. I set her down on the bed and began pacing.

"Jazz?" Her voice was almost inaudible. "Jasper, it's okay. You won't hurt me. I know you won't. Please…"

I turned to face her, knowing my eyes were now black with desire and thirst. I stalked towards her and leaned over the bed, pushing her back slightly. "So you trust me, Bella?"

She nodded. "Yes," she murmured.

I let my teeth graze over her neck. "Do you trust me now?" My thirst was waning a bit, desire overtaking me.

"Yes, Jasper. Just kiss me again. Love me…" I pulled back to look into her chocolate pools, my own dark eyes filled with worry. "You can control yourself, Jasper. You will. Believe me."

And I did. I believed that I could kiss her and roam her body with my hands. Hell, I believed I could probably make love to her with the way she said those words with such confidence and finality.

Our mouths connected again, and I found myself hovering over Bella with one of her legs hiked up on my hip. This time, I explored her mouth, and it was even better than I hoped it would be. She moaned into the kiss, and I decided to take her to my room. I lifted her up, and she wrapped her legs around my waist, breaking the kiss so that she could breathe. We both just smiled at each other as I walked us into my room, positioning us on my bed like we were on hers.

"Jasper, baby," she muttered, running her hands all over my face and body, as if she was memorizing my every feature through the clothes. "Make love to me…"

I was shocked to hear her say it, but I knew that we could not. "Then, Edward would know, and I don't want to hurt them, no matter how much I want to be with you. Your wedding is in two weeks, Bella."

I could feel the lust and hurt, guilt and betrayal coming off of her, but the most dominant was love. Her love for _me_. At least, I hoped it was.

"I don't care," she said lovingly. And at that moment, being the foolish vampire I was, I didn't either.

I wanted her - no, I _needed_ her - more than anything in this existence, so I sat up on my knees and slowly removed my shirt. She ran her hands over my chest and grinned with her eyes; they showed all of her caring disposition. I leaned down and kissed her lips sweetly, pulling her up and unbuttoning her pink blouse - I told her it was my favorite color on her. I pushed it off of her shoulders and threw it across the room. I stared down at her cream-colored chest, covered only in a white, lacy bra. Our arms entangled as we moved around each other to unsnap the other's jeans. I stood up and let my jeans pool to the floor, then went to the end of the bed and pulled Bella's off. I went back to hovering over her, my hand on her flushed cheek. I kissed her forehead, then her nose, then her lips. She smiled into the kiss, as did I, completely enveloped in the other's love. I reached under her, undoing the one thing covering her upper body. I asked for permission with my eyes, and she nodded, allowing me to pull the thin fabric off her arms. I threw it across the room and hooked my fingers in her soaked underwear, which made me even harder, removing them as well. She then proceeded to push down my boxers down my legs with her feet, and I kicked them off.

She kissed me lightly and whispered, "I love you. With all of my being, Jasper, I love you…"

I sighed, grinning slightly, but I had a feeling that she would still marry Edward so that we would not tear our family apart. "I love you, too, Isabella. More than you will ever know." I kissed her with as much passion as I could muster up, and she ran her hands all over my body. "Tell me if I hurt you. Just keep talking to me if I begin to lose control." I was so worried, but I didn't think I actually would.

"No worries, okay? But I promise, if it comes down to that, I will." I kissed her again. "Baby, please…" she moaned.

God, I loved it when she called me baby. I ran my hands up and down her sides and asked, "Are you sure, sweetheart?" The love in the room increased as soon as I said that name.

"I'm absolutely positive, baby…"

I positioned myself at her entrance, and she grabbed onto my shoulders, bracing for the pain ahead. I slid into her slowly until I reached her barrier, then I pulled back and pushed through. Tears ran from her eyes, and I kissed them all away.

"I'm so sorry, Bells."

"Don't be. It's worth it just to be like this with you," she smiled.

When she finally adjusted to my size, I slid out and thrust back in, both of us moaning at the pleasure it caused. I repeated it slowly, again and again. Her moans, whimpers, and groaning increased, and I knew that she was close. I was, too, but I was holding out for her. I began kissing her neck and rubbing circles on her hip with my thumb, absolutely dying to feel her clench around me. Finally, she did, with an ear shattering scream of my name. I moaned hers and collapsed, rolling off of her before I could crush her precious body.

"Thank you, Jasper. That was amazing. I'm glad you were my first." She blushed the sweetest shade of pink.

"Thanks for even letting me try. I…I wasn't sure I'd be able to keep in control of myself. I love you, Isabella Marie Swan."

She nestled herself into my side, her body covered in a sheen of sweat. "I love you more, Jasper Whitlock-Hale. So much more…" she trailed off, settling into a deep sleep as I pulled the comforter over us.


	4. Writing Songs

**Chapter 4: Writing Songs**

**A/N: The song in this chapter is called "Only Love" by Trademark. I didn't make it up, but for the story, Jasper did.**

**QUOTE: Our sweetest songs are those that tell the saddest of thoughts.  


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I laid there with Bella in my arms until the next morning.

She looked so beautiful, even though her hair was a mess and her body was tangled in the sheets. She was perfect. I woke her up and carried her to the bathroom in her room so that she could shower.

"I'll be quick," she promised, with a smile on her face.

I sure hoped so. We only had a day and a half until they got back, and I didn't want to waste the time we did not have.

I went to my bedroom and took a quick shower. Then, I sat down at my desk and got out some paper and a pen. While Bella was still in the shower, I was going to write a song for her, just to show my love. She could help me with the music by playing the piano. I worked and worked even after she finished cleaning up, but it didn't take me long to finish. I walked downstairs, and Bella was seated at the piano, playing random melodies.

"Um, Bella?"

She stopped playing and turned around. "Yes, Jazz?"

I was unusually nervous. "I…I wrote a song…for you…"

She grinned widely and scooted over, patting the seat next to her. I sat down, and she whispered, "That's so sweet of you. And Jasper, I really do mean what I said last night. I do love you very much." She kissed my cheek and blushed. Oh, how I loved that shade of pink.

"I love you, too." I kissed her softly on the lips. "So, since I love you and you love me, maybe you can help me with the music on this song?"

She squealed, "Of course! I would love to."

She wrapped her arms around my neck, and I wrapped mine around her waist. "I wish I never had to let go…" I murmured into her hair.

"I know. Me, too. But I'm still going to marry him. I won't be responsible for breaking up this family," she sighed.

I pulled away, placing my hand on her cheek. "I know. I'm not wanting you to be. I don't want either of us to be, so it's okay. No worries." I was struggling to get the words out. I wanted to be with her so much. "But I'll still love you."

She smiled a sad smile, one filled with love and anguish. "And I'll still love you…Well, let's get the music together for your song."

"Our song," I corrected, kissing her temple. She nodded in agreement.

We played different versions of the song all day, laughing when the other would do something silly or mess up. It was amazing just to pour my heart and soul out to this girl. She was my one, my only, and not even Alice could compare. I knew that I would have to live up to what I did, what we did, soon enough, but at that moment, I didn't care. It didn't seem like Bella cared either.

That night, Bella fell asleep in my arms once again. I pulled her as close to me as I could, and she clung to my shirt like it was the last time she would be like this with me. And it was highly possible that it was true.

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The next day, our family arrived home, and they seemed happy. All except for Alice. Bella and I both hugged everyone and greeted them like nothing had happened. I told Alice that we would talk later, and Bella just kissed her fiancé. I blocked my thoughts from Edward, singing the song I wrote over and over again in my head.

"That's really nice, Jasper. Did you write it?" he asked.

I smiled. "Yes, and Bella helped. Would you like to hear it?"

He nodded enthusiastically. The rest of the family looked confused, but they agreed after Edward explained it was a song. Bella blushed as she sat on the piano stool, and I sat next to her, sneakily snaking an arm around her waist.

"Um…The song…It's called _Only Love_," she told them, with a shaky voice.

"Don't be nervous," I muttered to her.

She grinned, as did I, as she began to play, and I began to sing.

_2am and the rain is falling_

_Here we are, at the crossroads once again_

_You're telling me you're so confused_

_You can't make up your mind_

_Is this meant to be?_

_You're asking me_

She joined in on the chorus, singing in her melodic voice.

_Only love can say_

_Try again or walk away_

_But I believe for you and me_

_The sun will shine one day_

_So I just play my part_

_Pray you'll have a change of heart_

_But I can't make you see it through_

_That's something only love can do_

I stopped singing, since it was now her solo.

_In your arms as the dawn is breaking_

_Face to face and a thousand miles apart_

_I've tried my best to make you see_

_There's hope beyond the pain_

_If we give enough_

_If we learn to trust_

We sang the rest of the song together, in perfect harmony, just like our hearts and souls.

_But only love can say_

_Try again or walk away_

_But I believe for you and me_

_The sun will shine one day_

_So I just play my part_

_Pray you'll have a change of heart_

_But I can't make you see it through_

_That's something only love can do_

_I know if I could find the words_

_To touch you deep inside_

_You'll give our dreams just one more chance_

_Don't let this be our last goodbye_

_But only love can say_

_Try again or walk away_

_But I believe for you and me_

_The sun will shine one day_

_So I just play my part_

_Pray you'll have a change of heart_

_But I can't make you see it through_

_That's something only love can do_

_That's something only love can do_

Bella sang the last line alone, and everyone applauded us. I leaned in to kiss Bella, but suddenly realized we weren't alone, so I just kissed her cheek and said, "Thanks for helping me, little sis."

"No problem," she whispered.

"You play the piano beautifully, Bella, and you have an amazing voice," Edward praised. "Why didn't you ever tell me?"

"Oh, I'm not that good. I like listening to you more," she dismissed.

He walked over, picked her up, and kissed her very lovingly. I had to start thinking of different songs I was writing to keep my jealous thoughts blocked. I walked over to Alice, and she grabbed my hand, running far away with me so that our family members would hear us.

"You wrote that song for her, didn't you?" she asked, sadness seeping into her voice.

"No. It's been in my head for awhile, and I thought she could help since I didn't know how to play the piano," I lied.

"I know you love her, Jasper. I had a vision, and you told her you loved her, then she was all like, 'I love you, too. Kiss me.' Then, you kissed her, but pulled away really quick, and that's all I saw." She began dry-sobbing. "How could you do this to me, Jazz?"

I pulled her into a tight hug, smoothing her hair down. "Listen…I want to be with you, okay? I don't know why I said it, but I did. It was just a spur of the moment thing. I love you, Alice, only you."

Her eyes lit up. "Really?"

"Really, really," I smiled. "Now, aren't you going to go help Bella with her dress and everything. There's only two more weeks until the wedding."

She squealed, "Yes! That's right! Thank you, Jazzy!" She kissed my cheek, actually believing me for once. "I love you."

"I love you, too!" I yelled, as she skipped away.

I followed her back inside, walking at a slow pace. _Isn't it funny how things always work out? The one time Alice shouldn't believe me, she does. But maybe that's a good thing. If Bella and I just pretend that nothing happened, it'll be as though it never did. Oh, who am I kidding? I love that cute, little, breakable human with all of my heart._ I stopped my thoughts at that, since I was coming up on the house, and instead, pictured random things and my ideas about them.

When I went inside, Alice, Bella, and Rose were getting ready to go to a dress fitting. Rosalie was becoming more friendly with Bella after finally understanding that she wasn't going to change her mind about being changed; they became as close as Alice and Bella. I went up to my room and began to write a song for Bella and Edward's rehearsal dinner coming up in just a week.

_Dancin' in the dark…Middle of the night…Takin' your heart…And holdin' it tight…_


	5. The Rehearsal Dinner

**Chapter 5: The Rehearsal Dinner**

**A/N: Dress and shoe pictures on profile. The song in this chapter is "It's Your Love" by Tim McGraw featuring Faith Hill.**

**QUOTE: A teardrop is insignificant in a pool of water, but it can touch the soul as it runs down someone's face.

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**The rehearsal dinner was that night. Alice and I were getting ready, and she looked simply amazing. She was wearing a red, daisy-covered dress, and it looked perfect on her. Her red heels added four inches to her height, making her taller than I've ever seen her. I wore a matching red button-down with the sleeves rolled up and black slacks.

We walked out of our room and downstairs, and I immediately noticed the girls' ensembles. Bella wore a simple, black and white, floral dress with black heels that I was sure she'd trip in by the end of the night. Rosalie wore a pretty, black, purple, pink, and white dress that was also covered in flowers, and her shoes were pink pumps. Esme was wearing a very colorful, flowery dress with bold, red heels. The girls all had one in thing in common - floral sundresses. Edward wore a white button-down - sleeves also rolled up - and black slacks. Emmett was wearing a light purple shirt, worn like mine and Edward's, and black dress pants. I internally laughed at the color Rose picked for him.

We got into our separate cars and drove to the ballroom we had rented out. It was probably a little too big, but we didn't care. We got a really nice catering service, and there was a huge table in the middle of the room. We waited no more than five minutes, and everyone was here, including Charlie, Renee, Phil, Jacob, the rest of the werewolf pack, and the Denali clan. I greeted everybody warmly, knowing that Bella would appreciate me for it.

My family had to eat the food to keep up the charade, and you could see the Quileute boys trying to contain their laughter. Each one of my family members excused themselves at different times to throw up the horrible food.

When everyone was done, I asked for their attention. I borrowed a guitar from the musicians we hired to play, and I was going to sing for Bella. "I wrote this song for today. I hope you like it. It's titled _It's Your Love._" Everyone looked and felt interested, so I began to sing.

_Dancin' in the dark_

_Middle of the night_

_Takin' your heart_

_And holdin' it tight_

_Emotional touch_

_Touchin' my skin_

_And askin' you to do what you've been doin' all over again_

_Oh, it's a beautiful thing_

_Don't think I can keep it all in_

_I just gotta let you know_

_What it is that won't let me go_

_It's your love_

_It just does something to me_

_Sends a shock right through me_

_I can't get enough_

_And if you wonder_

_About the spell I'm under_

_Oh, it's your love_

_Better than I was_

_More than I am_

_And all of this happened_

_By takin' your hand_

_Who I am now_

_Is who I wanted to be_

_And now, that we're together_

_I'm stronger than ever_

_I'm happy and free_

_Oh, it's a beautiful thing_

_Don't think I can keep it all in_

_And if you asked me why I changed_

_All I gotta do is say your sweet name_

_It's your love_

_It just does something to me_

_Sends a shock right through me_

_I can't get enough_

_And if you wonder_

_About the spell I'm under_

_Oh, it's your love_

_Oh, oh, oh_

_Oh, it's a beautiful thing_

_Don't think I can keep it all in_

_I just gotta let you know_

_What it is that won't let me go_

_It's your love_

_It just does something to me_

_Sends a shock right through me_

_I can't get enough_

_And if you wonder_

_About the spell I'm under_

_Oh, it's your love_

_It's your love_

_It's your love_

I stared into Bella's eyes for a moment, and a tear slid down her cheek. I wanted nothing more than to walk over there, wipe it away, and kiss her like she had never been kissed before. Edward tensed when I thought this, and I realized I hadn't been blocking my thoughts. I began to sing some country song I heard on the radio to cover up.

I was talking to Rosalie and Emmett when Jacob walked up to me. "I love her, too, ya know."

I smiled. "Yeah, I know. Doesn't it suck?"

He grinned, too. "So very much."

He walked off, and Rose asked, "What the hell was that about?"

"Nothing. Don't worry about it…"

She sighed. "Fine. Whatever. By the way, I really liked that song. It was wonderful, Jazz."

I could tell she was being genuine. "Thanks. I thought it went well with what today is about."

"It did, man. Awesome job," Emmett praised.

I was beaming when Bella walked up to me. "Thank you for everything, Jasper. It means a lot. Love you." Then, she kissed my cheek and proceeded to do and say similar things to Rose and Em, but I could see and feel the hidden meaning in her words. It just brightened my day more than the props I got for Bella's song.

When everyone said their goodbyes, we left. Bella asked Edward and Alice if it would be okay to ride with me so that she could talk to me about songs and such. They said that it would be okay, so she got into Alice's Porsche, and we began to drive away. I decided to go slower than everyone else so that we could have a chance to talk; we never did anymore.

"The song was perfect, Jazz. Not just for Edward and me, but for you and me. I really wish that we could be together…" she whispered.

I grabbed her hand over the center console and rubbed soothing circles on her palm with my thumb. "I know. Me, too. But I completely understand why you still want to marry him. I understand that you don't want to cause turmoil in our lives, but Bella, tell me this. If this was your one, true shot at real love, are you seriously willing to give it up so easily?"

"If it protects the rest of them from being hurt, then yes. Yes, I am." A tear ran down her pale face.

"Even if it involves me, too?" I asked incredulously.

"Jasper, you have Alice, and I have Edward. We're with who we're meant to be with, okay? What happened that night just…wasn't supposed to happen. It was just some weird, freaky thing that went on between us. It meant nothing, Jasper." She looked into my eyes, water cascading furiously down her now pink skin. "Nothing."

"I can feel what you're feeling, Bella. I know that you're lying."

"Do you? You only feel certain emotions that would lead you to think that. I love Edward with all of my heart. I'm going to marry him, and there's nothing you can do to change my mind."

I pulled the car over into an empty parking lot. "Not even this?" I asked before placing my lips upon hers.

She tangled her hand in my hair and clung to my shirt with her other one. I ran my fingers through her beautiful, brown locks and licked her lower lip. She gasped, and I slid my tongue into her mouth, exploring the warmth.

She pulled away, panting, and began to cry. "Damn it, Jasper! We can't do this! It'll destroy everyone! Do you not understand that?!"

"Okay, but when Edward screws you after you wed, how are you going to explain that you're not a virgin? Oh, but no worries. I'll let you handle that shit alone." I put the car in drive and pulled out of the lot at 100mph.

"Oh, my god. Edward won't love me anymore. He'll hate me forever," she bawled.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to say that…"

"No, you're right. I-I-I shouldn't h-have pushed you to d-do that with me. Holy shit. I'm a t-terrible p-p-person," she stuttered.

I stopped the car once again and cleaned her up after she was done crying. She reapplied some makeup and apologized. I told her that it was okay, that I was sorry, too. I took her to a small diner and got her a milkshake to go so that the family wouldn't think the worst. When we got home, Bella walked in, slurping on her milkshake, and Alice screamed.

"What the hell, Alice?!" Emmett exclaimed.

"Bella, you're not supposed to have sweets or anything! You're wedding is tomorrow! And you're not even supposed to be here, but I totally forgot! Crap!" Alice rambled, and everyone laughed.

Except for me. I knew that I would be losing Bella once and for all.


	6. The Wedding

**Chapter 6: The Wedding**

**A/N: The song in this chapter is "There You'll Be" by Faith Hill. I know I'm picking a lot of country songs, but they're so pretty. I'll be putting the dresses up in just a minute, so when you're done reading this chapter, if you wanna check it out, they'll be on my profile.  
**

**QUOTE: The hardest thing to do is to watch the one you love, love someone else.

* * *

  
**The next morning was hectic. Alice drove over to Bella's to get the bride, Rosalie, Angela, and herself ready. Angela wasn't able to make it to the rehearsal dinner, but she was still a bridesmaid. Esme and Renee, who decided to get dressed with Esme, decided to head over there when they were done getting ready. The theme of the wedding was a dark red and pure white; the colors were beautiful, however traditional they were. Edward wore a dark red vest with his crisp, black tuxedo, as did Emmett, Jacob, Carlisle, and I. Yes, Jacob was a groomsman, but only because Bella talked him into it. Emmett was the best man; I didn't want the guilt of standing next to the groom when I loved the bride. We all finished getting ready, and when Esme and Renee came out, everyone said they looked beautiful; and they did. Esme wore a long, dark red dress that was tight around the waist. Renee wore an empire waist dress that was also red. Well, all the bridesmaids were going to wear the same color, but I didn't know what their ensembles looked like, yet.

A couple of hours passed, and we - Edward, Emmett, Jacob, Carlisle, and myself - decided to head over to the large meadow where the wedding would take place. When we got there, I saw Alice, Rose, and Angela. They looked stunning in different versions of bridesmaids' gowns. They all had knee-length dresses on, but they were so very different. Alice's was strapless and had beading on the top part. Rosalie's was an almost off-the-shoulder type dress that was cinched around the waist. Angela's was simple, just like her. It had thick straps and pleating at above the waist. They walked into the back quickly to get ready for the show to start.

It was time, so I got in line behind Emmett and in front of Jacob. Bella's lullaby started - the song she chose to walk down the aisle to - and out came Ali, Rose, Angela, and finally, Bella and Charlie. Her gown was amazing. It had red accents, and the train was long with a red stripe down the back going all the way around the hem. She looked better than stunning, better than any adjective you could think of. Her hair was in ringlets around her perfect face, and at this moment, I couldn't help but think about what it would be like to be the groom. Edward snarled quietly, but I didn't care anymore. I wanted to be the one to love her, to be the one providing for her. I wanted to be the one she was marrying, just so I could show her off to the world as my beautiful wife. I wanted to spend the rest of my life with her.

She made it down the aisle, and she was now standing in front of Edward, smiling extremely wide. But I knew better. She felt like she was falling apart; she was sad, mad, depressed, pained, and she was the slightest bit happy. And underneath it all, there was a ton of love when she looked at me. It made me feel better, but nowhere near enough to make me okay with her going through with this. I let her anyway, though. Through every repeated line and vow of loving each other forever, I wanted nothing more than to scream at them both to stop and take a step back, but there was no way I could. So, I let the love of my life drift away into Edward's waiting kiss.

The reception was enough to kill me. I waited through the happily wedded couple's first dance, the shoving of cake into each others' mouths, and all the upbeat songs that I was forced to danced to, just so I could leave. Well, in my mind, I did, but Edward and Bella were still twirling and spinning to the rhythm of the song. I had been to enough weddings over the years to know what was coming next, though.

"Excuse me, everyone," Bella said into a microphone, pulling me out of my thoughts. "I wrote a song for two very special men in my life, both of whom I love more than words can say. You know who you are." She looked at Jacob and me, grinned, sat down at the grand piano, and began to sing.

_When I think back on these times_

_And the dreams we left behind_

_I'll be glad 'cause I was blessed_

_To get to have you in my life_

_When I look back on these days_

_I'll look and see your face_

_You were right there for me_

_In my dreams_

_I'll always see you soar above the sky_

_In my heart_

_There'll always be a place for you_

_For all my life_

_I'll keep a part of you with me_

_And everywhere I am_

_There you'll be_

_And everywhere I am_

_There you'll be_

_Well, you showed me how it feels_

_To feel the sky within my reach_

_And I always will remember_

_All the strength you gave to me_

_Your love made me make it through_

_Oh, I owe so much to you_

_You were right there for me_

_In my dreams_

_I'll always see you soar above the sky_

_In my heart_

_There'll always be a place for you_

_For all my life_

_I'll keep a part of you with me_

_And everywhere I am_

_There you'll be_

'_Cause I always saw in you_

_My light, my strength_

_And I want to thank you, now_

_For all the ways_

_You were right there for me_

_You were right there for me_

_In my dreams_

_I'll always see you soar above the sky_

_In my heart_

_There'll always be a place for you_

_For all my life_

_I'll keep a part of you with me_

_And everywhere I am_

_There you'll be_

_And everywhere I am_

_There you'll be_

Everyone clapped for her amazing performance, and she smiled. "Thank you. I just want you guys to know that I love you both more than my own life, and I will always cherish our memories."

God, I just wanted to run up there and tell every single person in the giant garden that I loved her. I knew that I couldn't, though. Just then, Edward walked up to me and pushed me into the small house in the field. He ran his hand over his face and sighed. I knew he was going to yell at me, or lash out at me, or something, but I was ready to handle anything he through at me. Literally. But I wasn't expecting what happened next.

"Are you in love with Bella?" he asked in a calm voice.

"I…Yeah, I am." I was going to lie, but he can read my freaking mind.

"Am I the only thing keeping you from her?"

"No. Bella and I made an agreement. We said that we weren't going to tear this family apart, and we're still not going to. I don't even know if she would want to be with me, but I just…I wish I could find out."

"I'm sorry, but she…God, I'm going to hate telling you this, but she was dreaming about you last night. She kept saying your name and how much she loves you, and she's sorry for everything."

"Edward, I apologize, and I'm not going to take her from you, but there's something you should know…" I trailed off.

"Yeah?" He looked a little afraid of what I was going to say.

"We made love…that week you went hunting," I said quietly.

"You WHAT?!" he yelled.

Just then, Bella came running in. "What's going on?"

"Why don't you ask your lover?" he snarled.

"You told him?" She looked at me with disbelief in her eyes.

"Yes. I might've told you that I was going to let you handle it alone, but I didn't want you to get hurt. Besides, we had to live up to our actions sometime," I explained.

"Why did you do it, love?" Edward questioned in a softer voice.

"It was just a spur of the moment thing. I didn't think, and I'm so very sorry that I hurt you. I understand if you don't want to be married anymore…" A tear ran down her made-up cheek. Alice forgot to use waterproof mascara, so it left a long, black trail on her flushed face.

"Of course, I still want to be with you, Isabella. You're the only one I want to spend the rest of my life with. Unless you want to be with Jasper…" He looked down, grabbing her left hand and stared at her wedding band.

"I can't live without you, Edward." She kissed his cheek and smiled, as did he. "Can I have a moment with Jazz?" He nodded, and I walked into the small living room and sat down on the couch. She followed me. "Talk to me, Jasper."

"There's nothing to say," I stated simply.

"Then, you obviously don't know your own facial expressions."

I sighed. "It's just so hard watching you be happy with him, when I'm sitting here, wanting to _be_ him. He's so lucky. He has you, the whole world in his hands, and I don't. Does that make it easier for you? Having me pour my heart out to you? Because if I had it my way, I'd be the one you were marrying today. I'd be the one you wanted to love, to be with, to spend the rest of your life standing by. I'd be him."

She threw her arms around my neck and sobbed. "Don't say that. Ever. I love you because you're you. You have all these little things that you do that make you stand out."

"Really?" That was weird. I never noticed.

She pulled away and smiled. She was beautiful, even when she was crying tears the color of the night. "Yeah. Like how you're so quiet, but when you're with me, you open up. And how you unconsciously flip your hair to get it out of your eyes, and how whenever we hold hands, you intertwine your fingers with mine." She grabbed my hand, and sure enough, I did just as she said. "And how whenever we kiss, I can feel all the love that you have for me in it." She kissed me sweetly. "And how, even when everything is going down hill, you manage to use all your strength to make things right. And how…" She looked down and sighed quietly. "And how, even when you know it's wrong, you still love me, just as much as I love you."

I was about to reply, but instead, her lips met mine in a fiery kiss. She tangled her hand in my hair and put the other one on my cheek. I mimicked her actions and kissed her with all the passion I had. I didn't want to pull away, but I had to for two reasons:

1.) Bella needed to breathe, and

2.) A high pitched gasp came out that only I could hear, and I knew that Alice had caught us.

She ran from the building and into Edward's arms. She pointed to us, where Bella was sitting on top of me, still placing kisses along my jaw. I know it was wrong, but I just stared into Edward's eyes as I kissed a path from Bella's ear to her neck. _I'm sorry, Edward._


	7. Just Like the Old Times

**Chapter 7: Just Like the Old Times**

**A/N: This seems terrible, but I changed my mind again. This has no bearing whatsoever on the books, just the characters.**

**QUOTE: Letting go isn't giving up. It's accepting that some things in life aren't meant to be.

* * *

**

It looked as though Edward would be crying if he could, as I placed my cold lips upon Bella's warm neck.

I whispered into her skin, "Stop."

She pulled away, a look of hurt in your eyes. "But I love you, Jasper. This is the only time I can be with you. Please, just kiss me again." She began to kiss my face all over.

"Bella!" I pushed her away slightly. "I love you, too. I want only you, but we've been caught." I pointed to Alice and Edward staring in disbelief at each other and mumbling too fast for me to be able to read their lips.

Edward began to make his way over. "Get off of him, Isabella."

"I'm sorry, Edward-" she started, but he cut her off.

"I don't care. You and me…We're going to talk somewhere privately, then we are leaving. Is that okay with you?"

"Where are we going?" she asked shakily.

He brushed the hair out of her face and smiled sadly. "On our honeymoon. I'm not going to hurt you. I just want to be alone with you. I want to reconnect with you, so we can begin our lives together. If you'll still have me, that is."

She nodded. "Of course, Edward. I would like nothing more than to not ruin this family by what I just did."He shook his head and took a step back. "Come with me because you want to, not because you feel it is your duty."

"I do want to come with you, Edward!" She jumped off of me, throwing her arms around his neck. I could feel her emotions, though. She kept throwing guilt waves at me, probably because of what just happened, and grief was welling up inside of her small body.

"I'm sorry, Edward," I said, standing up.

He nodded and told Bella to go say her goodbyes. When she was gone, he glared at me, and in a menacing tone, he replied, "I don't want your fucking apologies, Jasper. I want you to stay the hell away from Bella. We won't be coming back to Forks, so I suggest you move the fuck on and make up with _your wife_. Or did you forget you had one while you were screwing mine?"

"It was one time, Edward. And I can only do so much. She kissed me just now, okay? When we made love, she made the first move, so don't give me that shit. I know what she feels, and she loves me, too. She only wants to be with you to protect the rest of us."

"You're a fucking liar, Jasper. You'd say anything just to have the one person that I have ever loved."

"That's not true. You used to love Tanya, remember? Or did you forget while you were _dazzling _Bella into loving you?" I was getting really pissed, now.

"Who I love and what I do is none of your fucking business!" he yelled, making everyone stare at us.

"I could say the same to you, dickhead!" We were standing in the middle of the garden, now, surrounded by our family and friends.

"Why don't you just stay away from my wife?!"

"Why don't you leave me alone about mine?!" I retorted.

We both just stared at each other in silence for the longest time, everyone else looking back and forth between us. We both got toe to toe, our noses almost touching, and at the same time, we whispered, "Because I love her."

I jumped back. "What the fuck?!" I looked at Alice. "Alice?"

"I know, but I don't feel the same way. I only love you," she murmured, gazing into my eyes. I knew at once she was telling the truth because she felt that way, her eyes conveyed it, and Alice just doesn't lie.

"I'm sorry, baby. I really am. Let's go home," I said.

I knew exactly what I was doing, and I hated every minute of it. I was walking out of Bella's life before she could walk out of mine. I grabbed Alice's hand, and I smiled genuinely at her. I could get used to not having her around. It'd be just like the old times, when Alice and I would make love everyday, and I'd go shopping with her when Rose couldn't. I'd let her buy me all the clothes she wanted, just so she could dress me up because that's what made her happy. I'd forget that Isabella Marie Swan ever existed. I could do that, and I would - for Alice, for the family, for Edward, for me.

For Bella.

**A/N: Sorry this chapter is short. I couldn't think of another good place to stop it. No worries, though. I'm working on the next one tonight as well. Love you guys! Read and review, please.**


	8. Musical Expressions

**Chapter 8: Musical Expressions**

**A/N: The songs in this chapter are both by The Morning Light.**

**QUOTE: Music expresses that which cannot be said and on which it is impossible to be silent.

* * *

**

"Jasper?" Alice called from the bed.

I was sitting on the floor in a corner of our room. It had been a couple of days since the wedding, and I was just missing her more and more. "Yeah?"

"Can we talk?" she asked.

I nodded and got up, sitting across from her on the bed. "About what?"

"Us. I know you miss her and all, but she's not coming back."

"I know that. I'm sorry. I'll try to forget, okay? But it's not as easy as turning around and walking in the other direction."

"I never said it was. Look…I love you. I always have, and I always will, Jasper. You can't go on living like this."

I smirked. "Who said we're living?"

She laughed and smiled. "I had a vision earlier, Jazz. We're going to be great friends someday."

I grabbed her hand and rubbed circles on the back of it. "I love you, Al. It's just different with her."

She looked down, her eyes filled with sadness. "I know, but they've made up their minds. They aren't coming back to Forks."

I tilted her chin up. "I'm sorry." I kissed her softly on the lips, and her hand flew into my hair. She pulled me down on top of her and kissed me more hungrily. I pulled my lips from hers. "Ali, I can't. Not right now. Just give me some time."

"I have, and you still don't want me," she pouted.

I brushed the hair out of her face. "I do, just not in the same way as you want me."

"It's fine. I'm going to go hang out with Rose and Em. Wanna come?" she asked, getting up and heading towards the hall.

"No, I'm going to write some songs." She nodded and opened the door. "I really do love you, Al."

"I love you, too. So very much." Then, she left.

I sighed, retrieving my guitar from its case. I toyed with some melodies until I found one I liked. I wrote down the words as they came to mind, and thirty minutes later, I had a complete song. It was titled "The Love".

_When you finally fade from those nights you spend  
__Doing God only knows with your new friends  
__When you decide to come back  
You always can  
Ohh_

_Our lives are separate roads  
__We pick our separate ways  
__But the love I found  
__Reminds me everyday__  
That I still believe in you  
__I still have faith  
__I have faith_

_That you'll find your way  
__And realize your mistakes  
__Because I can't handle another night alone_

_And so, I'm trying to find words  
__To convince you to stay  
__Trying to pick myself up  
__But you're getting away_

_I keep falling down  
__The words won't come out  
__My tongue twists in circles  
__Keeps them trapped in my mouth_

_But I need the ocean or it's sand  
__Or the high that I felt when you first held my hand  
__And honey, I just can't feel right alone  
__Alone_

_Is there hope for this?  
__Because it's you that I miss  
__And I can't handle another night alone_

_Please start the sounds and the story lines  
__I'm falling apart  
__So watch as I unravel tonight  
__And swim through my changing life_

_Because I can't handle another long goodbye  
__Another sleepless night  
__This is my story line_

I played through it and smiled to myself, beginning to write the next song. It took me about twenty minutes for this one, and when I was done, I heard Alice walk in.

She sat on the couch in our room, while I sat on the bed, and asked, "Can I hear the next one?"

"If you want to. I mean, it's about Bella and me. I'm trying to get it out for us."

She nodded. "Of course, I do. Thank you, Jasper. What's it called?"

"_You're Not Mine._ Here it goes…" I began to strum the chords and sing.

_So, I've stayed up for the past few nights  
__And over time, I have realized  
__That after all of the time that I gave and I gave  
__It never kept you awake  
__But it pushed me to stay right here__  
And wait around for you  
__Just wait right here  
I'll be back for you_

_And I have lost my chance  
__To give this my best_

_You're not mine and I know it  
But that night, I couldn't hold it in  
__Because I feel just right  
__When you're standing next to me_

_I've got these perfect pictures in my head of possibility  
It was the words you whispered then  
They led me to believe  
You led me to believe_

_You're not mine and I know it  
But that night, I couldn't hold it in  
Because I feel just right  
When you're standing next to me_

_And I've thought about this night and day  
And oh, I wish that you could stay with me  
And hide inside the summer heat_

_And I could get better  
And I could give more  
And I can be better than you've had before_

_And I could get better  
And I could give more  
And I can be better than you've had before_

_You're not mine and I know it  
But that night, I couldn't hold it in  
Because I feel just right  
When you're standing next to me_

_I've thought about this night and day  
And oh, I wish that you could stay with me  
And hide inside the summer heat_

_You're not mine and I know it  
But that night, I couldn't hold it in__  
Because I feel just right  
When you're standing next to me  
When you're standing next to me_

_I've thought about this night and day  
And oh, I wish that you could stay with me  
And hide inside the summer heat_

I was a little self-conscious because I kind of poured my heart and soul into that song. "So, what did you think?"

"It was amazing, Jasper. Bella is a very lucky girl to have so many people care about her so much. Especially you." She looked down and started shaking slightly.

I walked over and pulled her into my lap. "Alice, I'm so sorry. Listen…I promise that that will be the last you hear of Bella Swan from me. Okay?"

She grinned slightly and nodded. "Okay. I love you so much, Jazzy."

"I love you, too." I kissed the tip of her nose and tried to think of the times when it was so incredibly true. The way she wanted it to be, anyway.

-----------------------------

"Edward? How is everything?" I heard Alice ask, after she picked up her cell phone.

I heard a muffled voice on the other line, and I strained to hear him. "It's fine. Bella seems a little sad, but it's been a month since we left. I don't know what's wrong, and every time I ask, she says nothing. Alice, baby, help me."

"Stop it, Edward," she snapped. "I'm not your baby. I only love Jazz, and he's getting better. Listen, don't call me again. I'll miss you two, but we need time." Then, she hung up.

"Hey, darlin'." I walked up behind her and wrapped my arms around her waist.

"Hey. That was…um…some telemarketer. He won't stop calling," she lied.

"Alice, I know that was Edward. You can talk to him if you want. It doesn't bother me." I struggled to get the words out for a couple of reasons:

1.) he took Bella away from me, and  
2.) he's in love with my wife.

The difference between Edward and I was that Bella reciprocated my feelings for her, while Alice didn't do the same for Edward.

"I don't want to talk to him," she replied.

"Okay." I picked her up and carried her to our room. "Alice, I was thinking that maybe you, Emmett, Rose, and I could all go to Europe for a few months."

Her face lit up. "That would be amazing, Jazzy. I love you."

"I love you, too." And this time, I meant it in every way.

I was falling back in love with my wife, and all because I left Bella before she could leave me.


	9. The Airport

**Chapter 9: The Airport**

**QUOTE: While I was holding on, all you did was let go.

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**DISCLAIMER: I do not own Twilight. All rights belong to Stephenie Meyer.

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"Is there anything else you want to take, baby?" Alice asked me, while we were packing our bags for Europe.

"Nope. I have everything I need right here by my side," I replied, earning a smile from her.

It had been three months since Bella and Edward left Washington, and it had been three months of trying to rid her of my mind. I wanted nothing more than to run to Alaska and claim her as my one and only, but I knew how impossible that was. I hadn't talked to Bella since her wedding day. I missed her more than anything, and I would've done whatever it took to get her back, including staying away from her for awhile. I just wanted to at least make a simple phone call to her cell, but I knew that once I did, that there would be no turning back. I would break Alice's, Bella's, and my own heart in the process. I couldn't let that happen, so I suggested the European trip to get as far away as we could. I thought it would be okay for a few months, at least. I mean, I would be with my beautiful wife, who loves me very much and whom I was falling back into love with. But there was a barrier. A barrier in which I named Bella.

Rose and Emmett carried our luggage to the car, while Alice pulled me down on the bed. Carlisle and Esme didn't want to go; they wanted to have the house to themselves for a little while.

"Jasper, you need to stop thinking about her." I began to interrupt, but Alice held up her hand and continued to talk. "It's been months, and I'm your wife, not her. You're hurting me, Jazz, with all of this lying and pretending. If you really want her, then go get her. Go to Alaska, and tell her everything, from how much you love her to the way you felt when she left your side. Jasper, if you really care about Bella, then you need to let her know, right now. Before we leave, you should run up there and explain."

I looked down. "You know I can't do that."

"And you know you should." Then, Alice stood up and rushed out to Emmett's Jeep.

I ran out to the car, as well, and slid in next to Rose. Alice was taking shotgun, while Emmett drove, and I knew why. Rose put her hand on my knee and began rubbing circles on it, in a comforting way. Soon, she was leaning against me the way she always did, smiling and content, despite the emotions inside of me. Rosalie was like my own personal empath; she always cheered me up. I wrapped my arm around her and sighed. She took a pen out of a console in the back seat and a sheet of paper. It read:

_I love you, Jasper. Even in these rough times, I love you. I always will, and I'll always be here for you. Always._

I grinned and kissed her temple, knowing it was true. She may be a conceited bitch at times, but she was the only one who ever truly helped me and stood by my side in the darkest of days. Even when I attacked Bella, she was there. Rosalie talked Edward out of leaving, while all Alice did was blame everything on me and cut off all communication between us for days. I used to be best friends with Emmett, but it had dissipated. Ever since I had attacked Bella. Same thing with Edward. Carlisle and Esme were helpful, but not like my sister was. Not like Rosalie. She was my safe haven, my confidante, and I was glad I had her if no one else.

We pulled up to the airport, and I saw a familiar face. Soon, I saw two familiar faces and luggage by their sides. I saw her, my Bella, with Edward. It looked like they were arguing, so I was going to wait for them to finish up. They announced our flight, but I wasn't ready to go. I wanted to talk to Bella.

Alice grabbed my wrist, and my eyes flew to hers. "I don't want to make you choose, but what are you going to do? Sit around and wait for them to take a break from their conversation, or come on the trip with us?"

"I'm coming on the trip. I was just shocked to see them here…"

"Shut up, lover boy. I just wish you'd admit it to me, at least. I mean, get it off your chest, and stop playing me as a fool." Then, Alice turned around and stomped off, with her Louis Vuitton luggage in tow.

"Alice! Wait! I'm sorry! You know I love you!" I yelled without realizing it, catching the attention of many bystanders and the not-so-happy, arguing couple across the way.

Bella's gaze locked onto mine, and she smiled sadly. She began to make her way over to me, but Edward grabbed her wrist. She turned to look at him with a stern expression, then slapped him. I could tell it wasn't hard enough to break her hand, just enough of a hit to get him to let go. When he did, she started to run to me. I looked at her and shook my head no, even though it broke my heart to do so. She slowed to a walk, but I could tell she was still determined to talk.

Bella finally stood in front of me and whispered, "I still love you, Jasper Whitlock Hale."

I tucked a piece of hair behind her ear. "I can't still love you, Isabella Marie Swan."

"Can't or don't?" she asked, hurt invading her voice.

"Can't. I do, but I can't. I'm sorry, but I have a plane to catch."

I pivoted and took a step, but she spoke again. "Do you remember what you said? What you told me?" I could hear the tears in her voice, but I didn't dare look back.

"No, I don't." And that was true.

"You said that you wished you never had to let go. Well, now, I'm standing here in front of you, wanting you to hold me more than ever, and you won't. I just don't get it. I don't get you. I thought I did, but I was wrong. I guess I made the right choice when I picked Edward. I guess you made the right choice when you walked away three months ago. And I guess I'm making the right choice, now. I mean, you taught me how to leave the one I love in the first place, right?" I heard her walking away, but I didn't have the energy to go after her.

She was right. She would always be right. I finally turned around when she yelled, "Get the hell away from me, Edward!" She grabbed her bags and left the airport. Just like that. But, like I said, she was right. I taught her how. And I just stood there, thinking about the way I felt when I did.


	10. Author's Note

**Author's Note.**

**Koger109 is having to take a break for family reasons. She's handing her account over to me, Alexia, for the time being. No worries. She'll be back as soon as possible.**

**Meanwhile, I will be starting a Rosalie/Jacob story soon. Please give it a shot. (:**

**-Alexia.**


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